Why Live
by Shannanaginns
Summary: Serena has decided that she is not needed in the world anymore. Can Darien stop her from ending her life? Rated because of major Angst.
1. Default Chapter

So this is my first Fanfic. I hope it's ok. I don't own any of the Sailor moon stuff. Although it would be cool if I did. (  
  
Why Live?  
  
This is the end. I've held them all back for to long. I'm always tripping and falling down, and making everything worse. They could be so much better without me.  
I was standing at the top of the tallest building I could find. To night I'm going to leave them. It's not like they need me. The scouts are always yelling at me. They say I'm always late and that it would have been better if I never came. Well, now I never will. Darien doesn't need me either. He has Reni.  
I stepped to the edge of the building. The wind blew my hair back out of my face and a solitary tear escaped and plummeted towards the ground.  
  
Darien's POV  
  
Serena is missing again. She was supposed to meet me at the movies, but she never came. I called her house but her mother thought she was with me. I got in contact with the rest of her friends and they didn't know where she was either. Now we are searching the city for her. I'm getting more and more worried about her. What if Rubius took her? Just then a drop of water fell onto my cheek. That's just what we need now, rain. I looked up to see how close the rain was, but I didn't see any clouds. It was a clear evening and the sun was sinking. I was about to look away, but something caught my eye. A girl was standing on the edge of the building crying. Another of her tears fell onto my face. She leaned closer to the edge. Then it hit me. She was going to kill herself. What on earth could be so bad that this girl would want to take herself out of the world?  
I had to stop her; nothing can be that bad. I took off running into the building. I pressed the button for the elevator and the doors swung open like it had been waiting for me. I rode it up to the top. It took about a minute, but it felt like a hour. As soon as the door opened I bolted out and screamed "No!"  
The girl swung around to look at me. The face that looked at me wasn't the one I was expecting, "Serena! What are you doing!?"  
She stepped off the edge to look me in the eye, "What does it look like Darien?"  
She's mad at me. Gods, did I push her to this? What did I do? "Serena," I said softly, "Please don't,"  
"Right, now you want me around. What's the point of my staying? You have Reni! Obviously, you find her more interesting than me. Just go be with her, and let me die in peace!"  
Her words pierced my heart. How could she think that I don't want her around? Doesn't she know I love her? "Please don't say that. I love you so much Serena. You mean the world to me. Please don't leave me alone. I've been alone for so long. Gods, Serena, I need you,"  
She looked up at me, "What good am I to you? I'm sure Reni would be more than happy to stay with you,"  
"I don't want Reni. Serena, Reni can't please me the way you can. I want to wake up every morning and see your face sleeping next to me,"  
A tear slid down her face. I wiped it away with my thumb.  
"Darien, I love you so much, but you can survive without me. Everything will be better without me," She turned and walked back towards the edge of the building, "Everything will be better," She said almost more to herself than to me.  
"No Serena! Please! No!" I ran towards her, but she had already climbed up to the edge.  
  
See look I can make cliffhangers too! Get it cliffhangers. Bwahahahahahaha. Ok so maybe not the best of jokes but it was there and I just had to use it. Well, r & r and if I get enough requests you will find out if Serena jumps. 


	2. Recovery?

Thanks for the reviews, they make me so happy!! Well, I guess I'll give you the next chapter. I don't own any sailor moon stuff. I wish I was that creative.  
  
Recovery?  
  
Serena took the final step, and disappeared over the edge. Darien's heart skipped a beat as he lunged over the edge just catching her arm in time. "Darien! Let me go! Let me die!!" Serena ordered from the air. She struggled to release her arm from his grasp, but once Darien had her he wasn't going to let go. He pulled her up back onto the building, and Serena collapsed next to him. She was too tired to struggle anymore, but she vowed to herself that this wasn't over.  
  
Darien's POV  
  
I'm so happy I stopped her from hurting herself. I can't even bring myself to think about what would have happened if I didn't catch her. What it would have been like without her. I have to show her how important she is to me. "Serena, why do you want to leave me?" I cradled her cheek in the palm of my hand. She looked up at me, "Because you don't want to be with me," "Of course I want to be with you. You're my life," She looked up at me and a tear fell from her eye. I lifted her up bridal style and walked over to the elevator. "Darien," She whispered into my ear, "I love you," I heard her breathe steady, and I knew she fell asleep. I didn't think her mom would appreciate my bringing her home passed out, so I brought her to my apartment. I called her mom and told her I found Serena, that she had gotten carried away playing in the arcade and lost track of time, and now she was over at my home. After I hung up with her mom I called all of her friends telling them the same story. "Yeah, but I went to check the arcade too, but I didn't see her or you there," Ami the smart one. Just great I was hoping no one went there. "You wouldn't have seen her there because she came to the movies. I stayed at the movie theater to see if she would show. She did and told me where she had been," "Oh ok. Well I'm glad she's all right. I'll talk to you later Darien, bye," Gods that was a close call. I walked over to my bedroom to check up on Serena. She was still sleeping peacefully. I just hope she is alright now. I'll need to talk to her in the morning. I'll make her pancakes. Just as I reached that conclusion the bell rang. I opened the door and a pink haired girl jumped onto me, "Darien! I had a bad dream!" It was Reni, "It's ok Reni; It was just a dream. Why aren't you at home? You could have spoken to Serena's mom instead of coming over here," I sat her down on the sofa. "No, they don't care like you do Darien," "Sure they do. Just give them the chance," "I don't want to. They don't love me. They just think I'm a handful, especially Serena," "That's not true Reni," I sat down next to her. She crawled over to me and laid down on my lap. I rubbed her head. "Only you care about me Darien," Before I could tell her she was wrong she fell asleep. I smiled down at her. She looks so much like Serena when she sleeps. She also thinks like Serena too. While I was thinking, the stress from the day took a hold of me and I drifted off to sleep.  
  
Serena's POV  
  
The sun shown into my face. I blinked my eyes open. Where was I? I rolled over to get a better look at my surroundings. It was Darien's room. Then the events of last night came rushing back. The pain I felt in my heart when I turned to end what little I had left. Then when all seemed lost, Darien reached out and saved me. The man I loved. I got out of bed to look for my savior. Tears swelled in my eyes once I looked upon Darien sleeping on the sofa with Reni bundled in his arms. He chose to sleep with Reni instead of me. He chose Reni. It was true Darien doesn't want me.  
  
Oh no! What is going to happen next?? To bad I know and you don't. Tee- hee. Will Serena go back to the building or will she realize Darien loves her more than anything? R & r to find out. Cuz if I don't get enough responses I'm not posting what happens. 


	3. comments

Ok y'all. I'm back. ::poltergeist voice:: Well, I'm gonna ask all of you for input. You guys tell me how you want the story to end. I have some of my own ideas, but I don't think you guys would like them since they kinda go along with that Angst theme. Well, then I'd have to change this to a tragedy to put it lightly, so back to the reason I wrote this. Give me input and I'll have the next chapter up by this weekend. 


	4. Death

Well, here's the next chapter. I took ideas from everyone that gave input. Thanks by the way. I won't keep you guys waiting any longer. I don't own Sailor Moon or any of the characters.  
  
I awoke slowly. Taking in my surroundings slowly. I was in the living room. I was on the couch. There was something on my lap. It was Reni. Reni, she fell asleep on my lap. I don't know why, but I feel a closeness with her. There is something about her. Of course the closeness I feel towards Reni is nothing compared to what I feel towards Serena. Serena, last night she felt so unloved. I'm going to make her breakfast. I opened my eyes. The sunlight was shining in from the sliding glass windows behind me. I didn't shut the blinds last night. One of the doors were open. I know I shut those. I slide Reni off of my lap slowly not wanting to wake her. She rolled over and curled into a ball. I couldn't help but smile. The smile didn't last long, though, it melted into a look of concern as I made my way towards the open sliding glass door. I walked out onto the balcony. My apartment was nine floors up. Serena was so desperate to end her life last night. The memories came rushing back. What if what I said wasn't enough? What if she enacted on her feelings from last night? What if she jumped? I ran to the edge and looked down. There was a crowd of people gathered down on the street. What were they looking at? Was it my Serena? I squinted my eyes to try and see. They were all looking across the street at the bar. Police were coming out with a person in hand cuffs. They finally caught the owner who had been selling marijuana from that bar for years, but that didn't matter to me. Relief washed over me. Serena was alright, but that fact that the sliding glass door was opened still hung over me. I walked back into the living room shutting the door behind me and locking it. I looked around the room for a sign of life. Just then I heard the bathroom. Water was running. I quickly looked to the couch. Reni was still sleeping peacefully there. There was only one person who could be in there, Serena. I walked to the door and listened closely. I didn't hear any movement; just the running of water. I tried the handle and it turned. Opening the door slowly I looked in not knowing what I was going to see inside. I shoved the door open and ran in. Serena was lying in the bathtub, face down. The water in it near overflowing. She must have been under the water for over five minutes. The amount of time I was out on the balcony. She used that as a distraction. She knew I would be concerned about how it got open and go out. Then she slipped into the bathroom which was directly in front of the couch. I lifted her body out of the water and laid her down on the ground. She wasn't breathing. I started to panic. I've lost her. My love is gone. My medical training kicked in and I began CPR. 1-2-3-4. Reni walked to the door sleepy eyed, "Darien what's going-" She cut off at the sight of my lips on Serena's mouth trying to bring life back into her. She stepped back in shock, "What happened?!". Her question sounded far in the back of my mind. What happened? What happened to make Serena want to leave me? I pumped harder on Serena's body. I blew more air into her lungs. Her lips were so cold. A tear rolled down my cheek. I've lost her.  
  
Serena's POV  
  
He would rather be with Reni. I mine as well make it easy for him to get rid of me. Instead of going through a soul splitting break up once he admits to himself he doesn't love me. A plan formulated in my mind. I'll drown. It'll be easier to clean up, but I've got to get him to go somewhere else. The sliding glass doors caught my attention. I'll open a door that way he'll think I went out to jump. Once he goes out I'll sneak into the bathroom and finish what I started last night. That way I won't be a bother to anyone anymore. I walked to the doors and slide one over. I noticed Darien stir. I quickly snuck back to his room. I heard him get off the couch and watched him move Reni careful not to wake her. He smiled at her. Just another stab to the heart. I followed him with my eyes to the glass doors and once he disappeared I snuck into the bathroom. Closing the door quietly behind me I turned to the bathtub. Here is where it ends. Here is where I'll finally find peace. Maybe I'll be with people that care for me afterwards. I ran the water. The tub filled slowly. I climbed in and laid down. The water wasn't high enough to drown in yet so I was left to lay there waiting for death. I couldn't help thinking about Darien. He always was with Reni. Whenever I ran into him now-a-days he was with her. She hung onto him with her small fingers never to let him go; never to let me be with him. It's only right for me to give him to her. The water covered my mouth and nose. I took my last breath. Darien will be happier. I thought back to last night. The look in his eyes as he tried to keep me from jumping. They told me he was telling the truth. That he loved me and only I could make him happy. I wish I could believe that, but it was only one night. Only one time. I remembered back to our first kiss. Our first time together. At least I won't be dieing a virgin. He took everything from me. My heart, my love, my innocence, . my soul. I felt my lungs start to burn with the need for air. I refused them the luxury. My eyes swelled with tears. Our first time making love came back to me. The love in his eyes. The question if it was alright. The concern he showed when he broke through me. The gentleness in his touch. He loved me. I gave him my heart, my love, my innocence, my soul. The world started to become a haze around me. My thoughts became less clear. All I could feel was the burning in my chest. I opened my mouth gasping involuntarily for air, but only water welcomed my lungs making matters worst. Things got dark around me. Wait, I don't want to die. I want to be with Darien. He loves me. What have I done? I blacked out.  
  
Darien's POV  
  
I was crying uncontrollably. Tears rushing down my face, I gasped for air while I sobbed. I didn't stop pumping against her chest. Maybe just maybe. Then it happened. She coughed. Water came spewing out of her mouth. She gasped for air. She's alive. I clutched her in my arms, "Serena, oh Gods, I thought I lost you," tears were still rolling down my face. They were of joy now. She was still sucking in air greedily, "Darien. I'm so. sorry. I.love you," she held onto me tightly. I had been waiting for so long to hear these words from her.  
  
Well, she kinda died for a while there now didn't she. It isn't over though, so don't worry. R & r and I'll start writing the next chapter. I can't exactly say when it will be up next, but I'll try to get it up a.s.a.p. Talk to y'all later! 


	5. I love you

Well, I think this is going to be the last chapter. Unless I get a lot of requests to continue.  
  
I don't own any Sailor moon characters.  
  
Darien's POV  
  
I picked Serena up and moved he back into my bedroom. She wrapped her arms around my neck as I carried her. I ignored Reni's wide eyes and her questions. All that matters right now is Serena. I laid her down carefully and gazed into her eyes. She looked up at me with loved sparkling in her eyes. My eyes changed to a look of sadness. Will she try again? Will I lose her?  
  
As if she read my mind she whispered, her voice a little hoarse, "I'm sorry Darien. I didn't realize until it was to late that I don't want to die, but I want to be with you,"  
  
"Don't be sorry. Just as long as you are with me," I gathered her up in my arms, holding her close, afraid to let her go for the fear of her taking back what she just said.  
  
I felt a new pressure on the bed, and remembered Reni. I turned my head towards her, and Serena followed my gaze. I felt her stiffen in my arms at the sight of the pink haired girl. Reni was the unknowing cause of all of Serena's suffering. How was I going to deal with this new problem?  
  
Reni spoke first, "Serena, why did you do that? You always think of yourself. What do you think Darien would have done if you had died?"  
  
Serena sat up away from me, and I missed her warmth, "You don't have the right to talk to me about selfishness. Whenever you are around Darien you hang all over him. Don't you think he has better things to do than hang around with a little brat like you," Serena's brow tugged together in anger.  
  
"Darien likes my company!"  
  
"Not all the time. Sometimes he would rather you go away so he can be with me!"  
  
"No he likes being around me more because I don't always cry and trip and fall!"  
  
Serena lifted her head at a higher angle. Reni's words stung I could tell by the gleam in her eyes.  
  
"Stop both of you!" I had to stop this. We were taking one step forward and five steps back.  
  
They looked at me, "I care for you both and I like being with both of you,"  
  
Serena's POV  
  
He likes being with me, but he also likes being with Reni. I don't want him to hate Reni, but I want him to tell her that he likes being around me more. That she is just a little girl and that he wants me. That I'm a reason for him to live. That I should live.  
  
"Yeah, but Darien you like being with me more, right?" Reni asked the question I was thinking.  
  
"No, Reni," He paused for a moment, "I like spending time with both of you equally,"  
  
My heart sank slightly.  
  
He continued, "I like being with both of you for different reasons though. Reni I like being with you because you are so innocent and you remind me so much of Serena, and Serena, I like being with you because I love you, and you give me reasons to live. I don't know what I would do with out you," Darien looked me in the eye. I felt tears well up. He really does love me.  
  
Darien's POV  
  
The doorbell rang in the distance, and the fact that it did didn't register until Reni said something.  
  
"Darien are you going to answer that?"  
  
"Huh. um. oh yeah," I rose off the bed still watching Serena wanting to hold her, "Hello?"  
  
"Darien it's Serena's mom," I opened the door, "I wanted to know if you knew where Reni was. I woke up this morning and she was gone. I'm a little worried, but I know she likes to come here in the mornings so I was wondering if she was here,"  
  
"Oh yeah, I'm sorry I thought you knew. She's here," I called for Reni and Serena's mom looked ecstatic. She ran in and gave her a hug and promised to take her out for pancakes. Reni smiled and left with her.  
  
I shut the door behind them and made my way back to my room. Serena was sitting on my bed with her knees curled into her chest. Tears shinning in her eyes.  
  
I stopped, frozen by the look in her eyes. I quickly regained my motion control and swiftly engulfed her in my embrace.  
  
"She didn't ask for me. She doesn't worry about me; only Reni,"  
  
"That's not true. She was just worried more about Reni because she's young,"  
  
"Yeah, but I'm her daughter,"  
  
"Serena, don't worry about it. All that matters is that I love you, and I care about you, and I never want to be without you," I held her closer to my chest.  
  
"Darien, I love you," Slowly she unfolded herself and pressed closer to me.  
  
"Promise me you will never leave me," I need her reassurance.  
  
"I promise that I will always be by your side," she spoke into my chest.  
  
I lowered my head and lifted her chin up to look me in the eyes. I sealed our love with a kiss. It was long and filled with all the love I have for her.  
  
"I love you," I whispered across her lips.  
  
Serena's POV  
  
"I love you too," I said into his mouth. This is how I always want us to be.  
  
The End  
  
Well, what do ya think? I hope you all enjoyed this. Now go read my other fic and I'll be happy. ( 


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